oh sweet jesus
oh sour jesus
oh BBQ jesus
oh cool ranch jesus
oh doritos locos tacos jesus
(via repress)
Oregon woman calls 911 to say her ex-boyfriend, wanted by the police, is trying to break into her house. Dispatcher says that due to recent budget cuts, the police no longer respond to emergencies during evenings or weekends. Ex-boyfriend eventually breaks in and rapes her.
This is a joke right? Nah it can’t be, the article is from NPR…
If you’re having an emergency, please have it between 8 to 5 from mondays to fridays
4 hours ago - 
1
1 
(Source: julianahuxtable, via bigbeautifulbro)
(Source: headbangwithhayley, via thegreatesttragedy)
THE POWER OF THE VAGINA
look at the gravitational pull of her vagina! he gets sucked right into it
(via juicyreckless)
(via juicyreckless)
(Source: erumi-on, via asterisknova)
Justin Bartels, Impression
‘The series focuses on the clothing that women think they should wear, or are told what to wear, to impress someone in a sexual manner. There is a physical mark that is left from these clothes, showing the discomfort women go through.’
If your undies hurt that means they’re the wrong size, you know they’re too tight but you hate to think you’re a couple sizes larger.
^This. Same for the bra. Last I checked most women wear undergarments because they don’t want to go commando or have their boobs dragging on the floor.
(Source: anorsexic)
The truth is lots of girls like me. Because, let’s face it, I’m pretty adorable, and my aloofness unconsciously reminds them of their fathers, so…I’m more used to them approaching me.
(Source: consultingpiskies, via redstitch88)
how to boys
foie:
- greet
- chat
- chat
- chat
- joke
- joke
- joke
- joke
- compliment appearance
- compliment personality
- flirt
- flirt
- flirt
- hug
- hug
- hug
- hug
- hug
- hug
- amorous hug
- amorous hug
- first kiss
- kiss
- kiss
- kiss
- make out
- make out
- make out
- make out
- woo-hoo
- woo-hoo
- woo-hoo
- propose
it took me a good 20 seconds of reading to get this was a sims reference
(via asterisknova)
Things that I write:
- Sins
Things that I don’t write:
- Tragedies
Things people haven’t heard of
- Closing the god damn door
Things the Bride is:
- A whore
Things I wouldn’t be caught dead in:
- This Place
(Source: anondracomalfoy, via therearestarsinmyeyes)
